Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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