my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Four minutes until I can fart!
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it