What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
My day in three words: secret purse cake
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Randomize
