you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
