By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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