Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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