i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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