We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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