I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
