I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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