Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize