I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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