No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize