I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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