Define "chronic" masturbator.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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