very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
