He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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