We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
