Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
