Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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