operation have a gay friend backfired
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my cat just said my name.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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