Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Do you have feelings for this penis?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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