well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
