saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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