I like my sex mixed with concussions.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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