two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize