Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
