Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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