I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
