the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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