i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize