I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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