Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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