So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
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