Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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