Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I would fuck him just for his dog
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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