this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
