Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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