just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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