Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize