i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
