...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize