You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
The air taste purple.
Randomize
