Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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