Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
