just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
