it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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