Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize