wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.