I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize