Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.

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(619): View more from California

I want to have your abortion

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.

Fav 5 1009 2617
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(303): View more from Colorado

he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.

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(805): View more from California

the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.

Fav 21 7588 2018
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(734): View more from Michigan

By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.

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(708): View more from Illinois

we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though

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(785): View more from Kansas

THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.

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(916): View more from California

Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me

(916): View more from California

They're the hard candy kind!

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