Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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